Why so blue panda bear?

This morning my mother asked me why I was feeling down today.  All I could do was shrug.  I didn’t exactly know why.  I just felt sad.  She replied,

That’s okay. 

Guess what?  It really is okay to feel sad or angry or whatever, AND you do not need to justify it to anyone.

I’m very lucky to have a mother who understands that because her acknowledging it was really all I needed.  I didn’t need a hug or someone to talk to.  I just needed to get it out there and move on.  Essentially, that’s what you have to do in recovery.  When those bad days happen, and believe me, they will happen, all you can do is acknowledge it, accept it, and eventually let your choices and time take care of it.  After 3 years of being in recovery, I do believe that a healthy balance of taking action and giving things time has the best results.  However, sometimes you’re just going to have to sit with the pain and wait for it to pass.  I don’t say that lightly.  It’s a very difficult thing to do.  You work your ass off and commit to making healthy, positive changes in your life, and all you want are instant results.  You want to feel good.  For once in your life, you want not just one good day, but two or three or ten.  Be patient.  If you’re like me, being patient is not your strong suit.  But you have to try.

Remember, your worst days in recovery are better than your best days in relapse.


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